*Lately

I Just Want Something A Bit More Solid. Deep.  Natural. Full.

I miss those curious days of youth.  Where I wondered and played freely like the world was at my fingertips.  * I just feel more and more controlled.  

I'm only going to be seventeen for a little while longer.  It's been a damn good year.  I don't want to be turn 18... The regret of not making enough songs when I was 17 is creeping into my constant thoughts.  I feel like my time is almost running out.  

But I also feel as hopeful as ever in my music.  But people telling me I can't do it.  But most of those comments come from me.  But most of it is true.  But I don't care.  

Just wait

you clown ass...

I'm sad, but it's all good.

Gotcha Bitch!

Evil as they come, vindictive as they make em
My friends keep asking me why I can't just walk away from
I'm addicted to the pain, the stress, the drama, I'm drawn to
Shit, I guess I'm a mess, cursed and blessed, but this time
I ain't changing my mind, I'm climbing out this abyss
You're screaming as I walk out that I'll be missed
But when you spoke of people who meant
The most to you, you left me off your list
Fuck you, hip hop, I'm leaving you -- my life sentence is served, bitch

ynot

Welcome to the nightlife, Nocturnal Activity

Got your brain wired in, Nocturnal Proximity

This your girl on my phone like slight infidelity

Whether she’s faithful is secret, like there ain’t not telling see

Cop this, like I committed a felony

I’m this world's guide home cuz they leaving a trail of me

I make the deaf listen, make blind guy vision

I’m the definition, ripping this shit, I’m killing

A milli is not important, when the death starts kissing

But might as well just die, when your girl starts wishing

You were me, stupid, you heard me

Girls treat me like the main course cuz they just really want to serve me

My passion is fashioned from the rappin that I’m blasting

I’m casually cashing in my tracks, if you were asking

Passable for dastardly, attics full of hats you see

Cuz when I’m on top, they just tip with top hattery

Rap?

Yeah... it's about fucking time

Ghost

There's this pressure that pushes outward from the inside of my chest.  Creepily thumping over my happiness.  It pushes all other emotions out of me.  My rib cage is being torn open by absolutely nothing.  I breathe so easily that it hurts.  Lungs and heart become nothing but colorful balloons.

I see, hear, and feel everything to be correct, but everything is wrong.  My logic is twisted.  I don't say anything and there is no response.  I'm awake and there is no rest.  I eat and there is no hunger.  I cry and so tears fall.  I say I'm happy and words come from my lips.  I feel the need to destroy.  I feel the need to create.

I hate and despise every ounce of my soul.  I wish my body evaporates into the air.

empty

I looked into the mirror and I didn't see a face.  I tried to show fear but there was no face to show it with.  I then proceed to expect myself to become alarmed.  But I felt so calm.  I felt so still.  I felt like nothing was inside of me.  I felt so empty

I feel so empty...  I feel so empty... I feel so empty inside

...

God

Without Condition

Am I the only one who can really understand this kind of love?  Why is everyone searching so hard for something that's right in front of them?  We've all had bad things come our way in life, but we have to understand that we can't hold on to those mishaps.  We all need to learn to let go, and maybe even make something good out of what was once bad.  You can't grow and learn something new without forgetting something old.  Out with the old and in with the new.

I find myself in the midst of people who don't know what might be the most important thing in the world. Did we somehow forget?  Were we born without?  Or do we choose to ignore?  My heart shatters for you.  As I swim towards to the end of the pool my friends drown in their ignorance.

But I could never get tired of you.  I will always try and love you without condition.  I need this range to expand to everyone in the world.  I mean.  Who doesn't need it?

I want to give it to you, no matter what the circumstance.  For the things I have security in, this is the most.

Cheer Up

Even through the joy I feel the pain...

I'd like to think that the world and everything around me is perfectly balanced.  The evil will always be faced with a good and wrong will always be met with right.  It's something that I can never hope to understand, till my time comes.  But for now, I can focus on the good.

People struggle with life's endless pain because they don't focus on life's endless joy.  I feel like I'm surrounded by a bunch of pessimists, who just whine like a bunch of whining whiney whiners... but I gotta be positive and make the best out of these people.  Show them my roots and where this amazing life spawns from.

Don't be stupid.  You misguided being of poor circumstance.  Live smart.  Find JOY!

Even if it kills me (oh and I hope it does).

idgaf

I do give a fuck because it definitely matters. It might just be because I'm just a really nice guy, but I know a lot of "nice" people who seriously don't give a shit. So I'm going to defecate all over this world, oh won't you join me?

It's OF Buttercup

Your taste in music is really odd. Isn't this really just morbid and unpleasant to listen to? It's nothing like your character at all... You're just trying to look cool huh?

Yes... I'm trying to look cool, but that's just me trying to be honest with other people. Don't just make false assumptions about my life because you also want to present yourself knowledgeable. It makes you look really ignorant.

Seriously?... you are the most egocentric bastard I know. You must be mentally ill to conjure up that kind of shit in your life. What's your deal?

HAHAHA!! That's exactly what I was thinking man... funny stuff dude, but really sad.

Where You At?

Some Kind Of Nature

I watched a documentary on dreams, it was like some special on PBS that they added to netflix recently. It was interesting enough for me to watch it to the end but it was about to put me to sleep. I also watched Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back... that was probably one the best comedies I've seen in a while. Kevin Smith is a pretty big baller. Started to add Plastic Beach to my normal listening cycle... genius. Logic Studio User Manual is whats on my reading plate, and it goes a lot faster than I thought.

Conversation seems to be more interesting when we discuss our opinion on media...

Mckgnao!

Whats it? Blog...

So my life was a little depressing when I found out that during tablo's speech at stanford he stated that he would no longer be making music. I was happy when I found out he only said so because he felt that there was something missing when he tried the creative process. He said "wouldn't you think I would eventually come back to it?"

Yes I do.

But I'm pretty nervous for my own life. I have this thing coming up in two days and I don't even know why I am but I'm living with no regrets right? I mean this shouldn't even be a big deal. It's not really something that is looked upon well. Some might say "sellout" or "mainstream faggot" but honestly who cares? Is this even blog worthy? hahahaha like anyone reads it.

But I like that no one reads my blogs. And if you do, don't say in the comments that you do. It loses beauty.

My favorite song on Goblin is... Goblin

this will be on tmrws exam

I'm in my 9th year of compulsory education, so when adults ask me "what are your plans?" and "what do you want to be when you grow up?" I, Mashiro Moritaka, age 14, answer "I don't know" or "I haven't decided yet." The normal path is from a good high school to a good university to a good company. So I'll just have a normal life. I don't want to cause trouble for my parents. I don't want to be a shut-in. Even though it'd be easier to stay at home and play games or be on the computer, I go to school. I don't want people to call me a freeloader when I grow up, so i'll get an office job even though I don't want to. The ones who'll get ahead in the world are the ones who have the highest grades right now. So it'll all just be an extension of this. It's a pain-in-the-ass boring future.

Word Is Truth

Some thoughts...

- We are all seeking God. Whether we know it or not depends on us. We would never want him if he didn't want us back.

- The things that distract us or the things that we feel are interruptions are the millions of messages that God sends us each day to live the correct way.

- The reason people are angry or why people think life is anything but beautiful is because they know close to nothing about God.

- You know how in cartoons the good will always prevail over the bad in the end? Well its pretty much the same thing in real life.

- People by nature are just dumb. They're dumb because they're lazy. Laziness was the original sin... Freewill can be such a pain.

I......

...... want to make a song like this... would be tight

One Goal

So I've set it in my mind to do this one thing in life...

To be successful is to complete my goal... to go all the way through

Live life with no regrets right? Yeah I too will no longer have fear.

Even if I know logically it would be wrong... I'm gong in blind

I wonder if Judas Iscariot had God on his side

Odd... FUTURE!!!!

Odd Future Gets Signed from Odd Future

not a lot to write about...

I have been memorizing bible verses... actually I don't remember all of them. It's more like I just use the verse packet as inspirations or motivators during the day. Life can get pretty interesting when you involve God... kinda obvious no?

(happy birthday dad)

New Dedication

I will write everyday in the morning for ten minutes... I will become great...

The Rich

F: The rich are different from you and me.

H: Yes they just have more money than us.

Are they aliens or the same?

Swag

I wonder where one would acquire such a thing...

my heart hurts...

It's the same kind of feeling you get if you swallow some candy and it gets stuck in your throat... but just in your chest. I just feel like if I can drink some water or just try to get it down to my stomach I can feel so much more comfortable. Even though I want tell myself that this terrible feeling will soon dissolve a part of me believes that maybe it never will. Could it be that I may be in this condition for the rest of my life? Maybe I will forever live my life in this state of constant choking and suffering. A simple task such as breathing will be the mark of my life. I will never be able to return to a better state of life. It's all down hill from now... Oh... it went away...

How pitiful it is to be so negative and to believe so strongly on one side of life. Nothing is ever single sided. It is narrow minded of you to think in such a way. You have not lived life.

Sad Endings

I realize that there are not many sad endings to movies or books. I mean there may be emotional ones but I don't think we can consider them a tragedy. There is always a victory in some way shape or form. You might say that our good friend Yogi's life had a tragic ending but of course there is the 5000 that he gives to boo boo. It's always about looking at the twisted bright side of things.

Can You Appreciate...

...Art?

Talking Mostly About Her Sex Appeal

FINALLSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A compilation of pure paper-cutting rapage...

Lecrae New Album

... just saying

Don't know if it's good yet, but it's number 2 on iTunes :D

StickMan

Yo

Stencil, Chairs, Alcohol, and Grit

So today was a pretty fun day I suppose. I got around to finish making my Rorschach stencil and I think it looks pretty good.

I got a new chair today. It's like an office chair with the wheels and stuff. Comfy.

And TRUE GRIT! That was an awesome movie I have to say. I def liked it much better than Big Lebowski? I that how you spell that? Yeah it was a good movie. It deserves the 8.4.

Also the beat for Keep Your Head Down DBSK. I really want it.

Word... again

This will be a small part of a bigger project I am working on.

Working on an emblem

Word